last week I learned the secret of the universe

    So my friend took me along to a pool party at work friend’s apartment last week. She introduced me to the few people she knew, and they were all really welcoming. There was a group of about 6 of us in the hot tub talking and joking.

    One girl, Jamie, brought up that she’d been looking for new shorts, but everywhere was so expensive. I excitedly told her, “Oh my god! There’s totally a sale at Urban right now. My friend, whose favorite position with her current boyfriend is reverse cowgirl, was there yesterday, and she said everything is like 75% off.”

     Jamie looked around, confused. With bug eyes and pursed lips, she asked, “…What? Position as in sex…position?”

    Unfazed, I replied, “Oh? Jamie? Yeah I don’t really get it, because that just doesn’t feel awesome for me. But she’s still really cool. Like if you met her you wouldn’t even know she loved reverse cowgirl.”

      Still perplexed, Jamie rephrased the question hanging on her furrowed brow, “Well like I don’t have anything against…that…but what did you mention it for?”

    I scoffed, “Uh because we are characters in an alternate universe, where everyone’s sexual preferences are used as qualifiers for a person. Like…our purpose is to show why it’s so strange when people in our creator’s world do the same thing, mentioning their ‘gay friend’ in a story where their sexual life is completely irrelevant.”

    Jamie was so on board The Knowledge Train after my excellent, scholarly explanation. She added with bubbly enthusiasm, “Oh! I get it! So, like, we are revealing how an exception is made for non-heterosexual or cis-gendered people on this specific set of social norms, which reveals an ‘othering’ of people in the lgbtq community that occurs in every day discourse.”

    “Exactly! We are basically demonstrating how being compelled to define someone by their sexual preference or gender identity can perpetuate the harmful alienation of individuals. On a macro scale, these types of scenarios are often times the reason that people are afraid to come out as non-heterosexual or make a transition that will make their physical appearance align with their true identity.” I cheerily added. 

A rousing chorus of, "Ohhhhh, ahhhh, ohhhhhh," from everyone in the hot tub slowly drifted into euphonious harmony of understanding and acceptance. 

[Cue double rainbow shooting across background]
[Cue piano music setting tempo with catchy tune]
[The entire party gathers behind me for a musical dance number we all magically know the words to]

[swaying and clapping to the tune of  High School Musical's "All in This Together"]

“Its juuust fucking caaah-mon deeee-sense-eeey
to re-spect pee-pole 

and not fear their diiiii-fferences

“Pleaeese fucking use caaah-mon deeee-sense-eeey.
If you don't, you're a jerk
on the wrong side of hiii-story"

[camera zoom slowly out and up to the heavens]

[Music fades out as last couplet repeats ten times]

         "Please fucking, please fucking, please fucking stop being an arse
           Please fucking, please fucking, please fucking stop being an arse."

[Fade to white]

[Aaaaaand complete fourth wall break. Enter writer using first person point of view]

Hi random people who ended up on this segment of the internet. This is just my little way of releasing some pent up saltiness about the heaps of non-inclusive language I have heard over the past couple weeks.

Do you want to be an arse? If not, join me! Spread the message throughout the lands! Tell people when they classify their friends, family members, and acquaintances unnecessarily, it is plain assholery. Do it kindly though, this could be a first time learning moment. Maybe no one has ever told them they were being a complete turd nugget. Explain the effects of their words and forgive them for the assholery they unwittingly displayed.

Okay y'all, I'm gonna cha-cha slide outta this blog post. See y'all in a kinder future!

Because for-profit corporations get more respect and consideration in lawmaking than human women do. #YesAllWomen

Luckily I have had insurance through my parents for my whole life. I am one lucky-fucking-privileged duck for never having truly worried about being denied professional healthcare services. Until today that is, when I saw every social media I have access to riddled with concern about the Burwell V. Hobby Lobby case.

The Supreme Court of the United States (SCOTUS) decided that Hobby Lobby could deny certain healthcare services to it's employees, if they conflicted with the corporation's religious views. Now I sit here terrified about the day I turn 26, because I will have to find my own insurance. 

Do me a favor and read that last sentence over, this time noting the inherent irony. I am AFRAID of choosing a service to INSURE my well-being.

Here is the thing. I am not so much shocked by a corporation making profit-based decisions. Nor am I shocked that some people think their lifestyle and belief system is the only honorable way to exist. I am shocked that our SCOTUS has opened a door for corporations to claim superior rights to the religious freedoms, which were originally designated to men and women with US citizenship as individuals.

I am rattled by the disregard for an employee's own religious beliefs or lack-thereof. Why is a corporation given more empathy than a human? I am disgusted that there is even a debate on whether or not the health of a woman is seen as essential. Why are women affected by this ruling not seen as humans? You fucking tell me, because I sure as shit am stumped on this one. I thought I was a human, but ya know maybe I've been mistaken. At this point, I'd be relieved to find out I was an alien. 

What really gets me the most about this whole thing is the classic trope of a protagonist being let down by their heroes. You know the story, kid grows up dedicating their whole existence to the good they see in someone. Then one day they see their faults and their heart breaks. In this case, I've seen my glorious government display a repulsive disregard for the common people, especially women.

In sixth grade, my hero became the Good 'Ol USA, when we learned the core democratic values of our nation, in Mrs. Combs history class. We got to pick a value we wanted to focus on and did about 3 weeks of studying, art projects, group presentations, and a paper on that core democratic value. 

My value of choice was The Common Good. I feel in love with the people of history linked to this value—Patrick Henry, Abraham Lincoln, and Thurgood Marshall to name a few that still give me Political Science butterflies to this day.

Never had I seen such poetry in a history class before this project. Beautiful proclamations of humanity's propensity to love one another rang through my mind, as I read books and webpages and watched documentaries on so many wonderful people. 

I was overwhelmed with how many people in our past have dedicated their lives to the idea that everyone deserves to feel valued, heard, and safe. And so I fell in love with the youthful spirit of our country. I couldn't get enough of these feats of victory for the Common Good over the selfishness, arrogance, or greed of individuals and/or oppressive factions. 

Yes, I had a giant, nerdy, lady-boner for the government of the USA. Damn did it look fine in outfitted in rulings based of the Common Good. And yes, my cheeks flushed when the wind blew a flag just right, flashing its progressive attitude of acceptance and accommodation. (I'm sorry, this blog is supposed to be PG. I'll get to the heartbreak and skip the R rated passionate parts.)

In all sincerity though, I feel let down. The SCOTUS is a position dedicated to making choices that benefit the Common Good. I do not believe the Burwell V. Hobby Lobby ruling was made with this value in mind. It is a mystery to me how someone can forget to care for others.

The only productive thing for me to do now is work towards change. Hopefully one day my name will be a footnote in some kid's history book. Or maybe an afterthought of a historian, who just complied their synopsis of a 21st century social movement benefiting the common good. At the very least, I hope I never act in a way that makes another person feel the neglect and disappointment I do now.